Lucky #7

Today was a good day.  Not too crazy, but not to slow.  And the attitudes in the office were great.  That is a rare thing.  So when it's there, I take it all in for as long as I can.

Since there really isn't anything to tell you about my day, I'm going to tell you about the types of patients we get.

#1.  The Eeyore.

This type of patient has nothing good to say.  "How are you today??" "Eh.  Couldn't get worse I guess." Ok then.  They are the types that complain about how you do your job, how the Dr. does her job and how awful of a life they have.  Their fish died, their milk went bad, the toilet clogged, then their allergies acted up today.

#2. The Rabbit.

The Rabbit is a name I made up for people who are ALWAYS late.  They call or text (yes, our office texts patients) and ask for an appointment, I put it in, they show up an hour late, without an apology.  Hey, they'll be here when they get here.

#3. The Houdini.

Houdini will appear one moment and disappear another.  These types of patients will come in for awhile, fall off the face of the earth, then come back again.  Abra-cadabra.

#4. The English Professor.

I love these types.  They point out everything that is misspelled in the office.  From the ticker on our televisions, to the website to the fine print on our mazagines.  Oops, I mean M-A-G-A-Z-I-N-E-S.



#5. The Gabbers.

I love to talk.  I know I don't seem that way, but I do.  However, I do know when to stop.  And as much as I would like to hear your story about how your last meal didn't sit well with you, I really do have to get back to my job.

#6. The Cell-Phone Addicts.

Really?  You can't put the phone down for 2 seconds to make your next appointment??  Even I get through a whole work shift without my phone!  These types talk on their cellphones loudly in the waiting room, tell me to wait when I go in, so they can finish their text and have even told the Dr. to "come back in a few minutes."  That goes over well.  My favorite is when they don't use words, just their hands.  Like shhh or could you give me minute please...geez.  Love. it.

#7.  The Perfects.

Now these are, unfortunately, hard to find types.  These patients, keep their appointments, pay their bill on time, call if they're going to be late or need to cancel and always thank you for what you do.  If only we had more of these types.

Now, I'm not complaining about these types, I'm just saying they could be better.  I'm just speakin' the truth.  But yes, I would much rather hear about your grandchild's first day of Kindergarten rather than how you stepped in dog poop.


Or that you were late because of traffic rather than the fact you just decided to sleep in.  Or that you keep your appointments.  More than once a year.  The spelling in the magazine?  Just don't.

Oh and we've implemented a new policy: